just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
