just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
