she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
