At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
