Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
