oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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