what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
