i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
