Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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