I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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