quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize
