There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
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