someone owes me an orgasm
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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