If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
