In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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