I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
