Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
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