Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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