Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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