I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
