We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
