first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
