i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
