I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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