just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
