Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
he shaved USA in his pubs
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
