If i come over, it means nothing
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
