Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
