You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
