did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
