I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
