Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
