CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
