The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize
