I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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