Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
