just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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