you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Randomize
