doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
