I looked at my own cervix.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Randomize
