I could have mohawked her pubes.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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