is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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