i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
