I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize