GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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