How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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