I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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