xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
