All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Randomize