she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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